Call for Fire, Call for Forgiveness

In the hush before the blast, I steady my breath,

Maps stained with mud, prayers whispered to death.

Coordinates inked on trembling skin,

One call for fire, let the reckoning begin.

Steel in my voice, sorrow in my soul,

The barrel speaks truths I can't control.

A flare arcs high like a soul set free,

But war doesn't ask who we're meant to be.

I've painted targets on homes with names,

Watched silence rise from smoldering flames.

Radio crackles: "Shot out. Splash, over."

But no code clears a heart that won't recover.

I've seen ghosts in the smoke, not enemies, kin,

And begged for redemption I buried within.

Each shell a burden I'll carry for years,

Each crater a chalice collecting my tears.

Forgive me, Father, for what I've become,

A son with a rifle, not a mother's one.

I followed orders; I did my part —

But no uniform can shield a breaking heart.

Call for fire, when rage runs deep.

Call for forgiveness, when I try to sleep.

Two voices inside, one cursed, one kind —

Both echo loud in a soldier's mind.

So aim the muzzle, but lift the prayer,

For even warriors need someone to care.

We fight for peace, we die to feel,

But only forgiveness can help us heal.